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US: Kurdish sisters struggle without
family ties
10.12.2006 |
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December 10, 2006
When Heja and Honer Osman came to this country from
Iraq during the Gulf War, they didn't realize just
how much their lives would change.
The Kurdish sisters immigrated to Dallas with their
parents and siblings before they moved to Nashville
in the mid-1990s. As the sisters matured, they
became increasingly more interested in the American
culture surrounding them than the one they were born
into, they said.
As adults, the women were ostracized by their family
and Nashville's burgeoning Kurdish community for
dating and having children with men outside of their
race, they said.
"Being from Iraq, when you move out, you are
disowned," said Heja Osman, 23. "My parents don't
live far, but we never see them."
The girls moved out of their parents' home roughly
three years ago. By doing that, they broke the
tradition of going from their parents' house to
their husbands' house, they said.
Since they have been on their own, the two have
worked together to make ends meet.
The two-bedroom apartment where they live costs $515
in rent each month. They receive $350 a month in
food stamps from the state, they said. Then there
are the utilities: electricity $150 and the $200
phone bill, which Honer is considering not paying.
"It wasn't because I don't have the money for it,"
she said. The bill is high because her fiance is in
prison and calls collect often. "That's money that I
could be spending on my daughter's winter clothes."
Honer Osman is the only one working right now. Her
sister, Heja, is eight months pregnant and is too
sick to work. They are scraping by because Heja
stays home with Honer's 18-month-old daughter,
Courtlyn Garner, so she doesn't have to pay for day
care.
Agency helps teens
Honer, who turns 22 today, has received help from
Youth CAN, a federally funded program that provides
a number of social services to young adults between
the ages of 14 and 21.
Once in the program, its participants stay with
Youth CAN until they obtain their GED or complete
job training despite their age, said Marilyn
Friedlander, the program's technical assistant.
The program removes the obstacles from achieving and
maintaining employment, such as transportation
issues and day care, she said.
In the absence of family, the staff at Youth CAN has
become a sort of surrogate family to the sisters,
they said.
But there are some things that Youth CAN can't
provide for the sisters.
Honer Osman works in the kitchen at Vanderbilt
University's food court at Rand Hall. It's a good
job, but the hours
are too seasonal, she said.
Honer must wear a uniform to work but only has one
pair of the required black pants and only a few
white shirts. As a result, she washes them about
every other night, which drives up the electricity
bill, she said.
She is scheduled for 40 hours each week at $8 per
hour and after taxes often brings home roughly $250
a week. However, every time the students are out of
school, she's off from work — without pay.
During the Thanksgiving holidays, Honer was out of
work nine days. For the Christmas break, which
begins next week, she'll be out of work for at least
23 days, she said. So she has to figure out how
she's going to pay January's rent, she said.
Paychecks stretched thin
"Every time I save money, I wind up using it to make
it through times when I'm not working," Honer Osman
said.
After she has the baby, Heja plans on returning to
work. The pair will work opposite shifts so the one
can stay home with the children while the other is
working.
And Honer's car, a late-1990s model Chevrolet
Cavalier, no longer has heat and needs a new part,
which she's priced between $150 and $175 and another
$150 for the labor.
Together with the help of friends, who bring diapers
when they need them, the sisters are determined to
make it.
"It's horrible trying to make (the food) last,
everything is so expensive," said Heja Osman. "It's
horrible struggling while you are pregnant. It's
just not a good feeling."
tennessean com
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